Grand Idea

The sun is shining brightly, the birds chirp so loud that I can hear the song inside as clear as I would stand beside them. Could we now start the countdown with the snow?

Last night I cut myself with a very sharp knife right in my left hand so that the blade almost pierced the hand. I could not do any knitting afterwards, so my quilt-project is falling behind. Luckily some of my friends have start to knit some pieces themselves, this eases my chore. The idea is to knit squares of woolen garn and sow them together to form a big quilt, which is sent to the Finnish Red Cross and from there somewhere in the world for people in need. My daughter and I have knitted about 40 squares, so there’s just enough for one quilt. The goal is to make 20 quilts before the end of May. Ambitious, Yes!

When talking with my mother yesterday, I got a splendid idea – all of my experiences will be put together to publish a book. This blog is the base for this book, and I thought of translating these entries to Finnish and Swedish, so that my book can be published in three different languages instantly. The first book would be titled “Isa – the First Year with Buerger’s Disease”. Now that I wrote it down, it does sound quite lame. “In Fear of Amputation” “Fighting the Windmills” They sound a bit better, but do they tell the truth? Well, I have ample time to figure out the name.

Feels like nothing goes the way I’d like them to go. I still feel discouraged after the visit from our community’s head of the disabled and the elderly. I had thought that now I would be able to do something else than to sit around the house, but no. That would have been too easy. After a few hours of sleep, it doesn’t even feel like I want to make things happen. Instead it made me want to pack our bags and move away. Still I am stuck here inside these four walls. Looks like once again if you want something done – do it yourself.

The pain in my hand from this writing is getting worse, so I’d better stop. I am going to spend the rest of the day dreaming about utopia, where things go smoothly the way I want.